Peak Season

____: hey how are you? What's new?

Singleroom@western: Um, nothing really, what about you?

_____: well I--

Singleroom@western: (interrupts) Ok well there is SOMETHING kinda sick that happened

____:....please, go ahead.

Singleroom@western: K well you know that show peak season? And like, you know Dre? Or like, whatever his name is? Anyways hes the hot one.

____: yeah, vaguely.

Singleroom@western: OK so like he was at the bar the other night and like, so was I, and we totally saw each other and I was just like pretending that I had seen him before. I mean, I was looking at him all like "do I know you??" and he was all like "damn girl" so like I went over to the bar and we started talking and I was SO wheeling him and--

____: hold on. Wheeling?! What the fuck is that?

Singleroom@western: (gross throat noise) Seriously? Its like, you know, like getting there. Like picking up...

____: huh.

Singleroom@western: So ok whatever so we were like talking and stuff and I was like "oh my god you seem SO familiar" like I wanted to pretend that I didnt know him and stuff, right? Cuz like celebrities are people too and I didnt want to make him feel awkward/

____: how kind of you

Singleroom@western: YA i know Right?! SO anyways long story short we like made out a bit and now we're friends on facebook.

Its not a leotard, reotard.

Singelroom@western: SO girl what did you end up wearing on Saturday?

______: Um, black tights, a leopard print onesie and a black blazer.

Singleroom@western: Oh really? Weird...why would you wear that?

______: What? What do you mean it looked awesome...

Singleroom@western: I dunno I've just never seen anyone wear tights AND a onesie and I think it would look like totally weird, y'know?


Singleroom@western: But like if you\re wearing a onesie your legs are like, already covered, right? So like, why would you bother putting tights underneath? that just seems like kinda weird and lame to me.

______: I have absolutley no idea what you're talking about.

Singleroom@western: OMG. WAIT. A onesie?! holy shit I though you were talking about a leotard! I was like why the hell would you be wearing a leotard in the first place and then like, putting tights under it. Oh my god I'm so retarded I totally thought you went out in public wearing a full body leotard.

_____:.....nope, I didn't.